An Observation on Life

As you may have heard, DD recently turned eleven. I periodically write about my experiences as a parent and about the pride I have in my children. DD and I have an interesting relationship in that we have honest and connected conversations about many things.

As she's gotten older, she asks me about things and I try to explain them to her, or at least I try to explain my perspective on them to her. For example, we've had several conversations about B's drug use and how the choices he's made have lead to various outcomes. We've spoken about the importance of self-image and how a poor sense of self can lead to choices and actions that are less than ideal.

We've talked about divorce (and separation) and why it's important to focus on what's possible, rather than what wasn't. We've talked about Kara's unique situation and how her experiences as a child of divorce is different than DD's...and how those differences complicates Kara's experiences, actions, and choices. We've even spoken about how Kara's sense of identity is more complicated because of the roadblocks my ex raises.

DD and I have talked about responsibility, both personal and financial. (She's really wants a cell phone and is desperately trying to convince us to get her one.) We've talked about cause and effect...and why it's important to plan a few things out before you jump into them.

DD surprises me with how much she understands, especially for someone of her age. She's aware of other people's feelings and tries hard to take them into account when she makes her own choices. She understands that things don't always work out the way one would like. She understands that frustration is a part of life.

Yet, through it all, she is cheerful, bubbly, goofy, loving, generous in spirit, and...well, happy. She's a very happy, giving spirit.

I mention this because I wanted to share a poem she wrote yesterday. She calls it Life.

Past is our Present
We can’t leave it behind
It maybe the hope we carry
Or the guilt we hold
We can’t let it go

The Present is our Future
We worry what will happen next
We won’t know what to do
Or how it will happen
So we pray

Future holds the pain
We struggle through the years
Sometimes we’ll lose our dignity
But never faith
We hold faith in others
But hardly our selves

We may cry
We may laugh
We may lose hope
But don’t give up

Our lives are difficult
We’ll lose the things that mean the most
Our friends, our family
We are here for a reason
To live, to be imperfect, to be different
But not suffer so let us remember
In our times of need to stick together